Hair What I'm Saying
“Hair What I’m Saying” is where healing, beauty, and honest storytelling meet. Hosted by Kinetra, a licensed hair expert, deep thinker, and truth-teller, this show has earned a spot in the top 5% of podcasts worldwide, on Listen Notes. It goes beyond the surface to explore the emotional, spiritual, and personal layers behind hair, identity, and growth.
Whether it’s uncovering the science of hair loss, breaking generational cycles, or reflecting on real-life relationships, each episode holds space for vulnerable conversations, self-discovery, and unapologetic truth. If you’ve ever found power in your pain or beauty in your becoming, this podcast is for you.
Hair What I'm Saying
Holistic Approach to Hair Loss & Restoration with Empress of The Root and Honey
In this eye opening episode, we engage with Empress, a multi-licensed beauty ritualist and founder of Root Honey, who bridges the worlds of beauty and holistic wellness. Our conversation delves into the transformative power that hair has in our identity and emotional well-being, revealing how beauty rituals serve as a portal to self-care and acceptance.
Empress shares her journey and cultural connections to beauty, emphasizing that hair is much more than just a physical trait — it holds deep significance linked to our histories, communities, and mental health. Together, we explore emotional challenges faced by many, including the struggles of hair loss and the healing journey that unfolds through mindfulness and holistic approaches.
Listeners will discover practical strategies like mirror work and affirmations that support emotional healing while promoting healthy hair practices. These insights highlight the importance of nurturing oneself and embracing change with grace.
As Empress invites us to engage in deep conversations about mental health and beauty, she also looks ahead to exciting upcoming workshops that foster community and support. This episode resonates with anyone seeking to find empowerment through their beauty journeys.
Join us for this thought-provoking exploration, and let’s redefine our relationships with our hair together. Don't forget to subscribe, share, and leave us a review!
Stay Connected with Empress by Following the Links Below:
Instrumentals: duwhop_2.0
Do you have a story to share that’s worth our listeners hearing, please fill out the Listener Letters Form and tell us your story! We would love to hear from you!
Don't forget to follow Kinetra on Instagram @_hairwhatimsaying_ and check out her website Hair What I'm Saying for more.
Please leave a review and rate the show. Let us know how we are doing!
🎥Create Viral Clips with Opus Clips
Support the Hair What I’m Saying Podcast
If this podcast has ever made you feel seen, inspired, or helped you better understand your hair, please consider supporting it. Every single donation; no matter the size, makes a difference and helps me continue creating meaningful conversations and sharing real solutions for your hair journey.
💛 From the bottom of my heart, thank you for being part of this community.
buymeacoffee.com/hairwhatimsaying
Welcome back to another episode of Hair what I'm Saying. Today we're diving into the transformative power of beauty as a ritual for well-being, with a very special guest. Joining us is Empress, a multi-licensed beauty ritualist. Textured hair specialist, herbalist and esthetician and educator. Hair specialist, herbalist and esthetician and educator. Through her brand, root Honey, she bridges the worlds of beauty and holistic wellness, exploring a sacred connection between self-care and community care. Empress brings a unique perspective to the conversation, blending the art and science of textured hair care with intentional beauty rituals that nurture both hair and soul. In this episode, we'll discuss the emotional impact of hair loss, holistic approaches to hair restoration and how we can create more mindful, balanced spaces in the beauty industry. So, whether you're a beauty professional, a client on a hair journey or just someone looking for a deeper connection to your beauty rituals, this episode is for you. Let's get into it.
Speaker 1:Welcome to the Hair what I'm Saying podcast. I'm your host, kenetra Stewart. Today we have Empress of Root Honey, all the way from Detroit, michigan, joining us. Welcome to the show, empress. How are you? I'm well. How are you Doing? Fantastic. Thank you so much for being a guest on the show. I really appreciate you wanting to share your holistic perspective on how to restore hair loss, so thank you.
Speaker 1:Thank you. Thank you, is this your first podcast? No, this is not my first one this is my second one, though.
Speaker 1:Okay, good, that's good information. I just like to know, you know, and I don't even know why I like to know. I just like to know to know, you know, and I don't even know why I like to know. I just like to know, yeah, yeah, see, how the flow gonna be. Yeah, oh, yeah, I guess. So the flow. And I just remember, like recording my first podcast, how nervous I was. So, you know, I just want to know, like trying to feel your energy on the other side of the camera.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yes.
Speaker 1:Can you share a little bit about yourself and what led you to become a holistic wellness advocate and beauty ritualist? Yes, so I'm Empress, as she said, founder of Root Honey. My journey through holistic beauty has been a deeply personal thing and a deeply spiritual thing, so it was kind of only natural that this is the expression of it. Now, I grew up in some natural hair salons in Detroit and my, my grandmother, my great-grandmother, that I later found out was actually a cosmetologist and herbalist. Oh wow. But the thing was is that she passed right before she actually got her physical license. And, yeah, I guess I just kind of come through all of that the elders in my community that have been pioneers in the industry for a very long time. I spent some time working at Textures by Nefertiti, which is a prominent salon here in Detroit. It's not like I've heard of that, I'm sure you have.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think I have.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so being poured into by elders and I literally started working there when I was 14 and stayed there until recently and, yeah, just being poured into by the women getting the feel of being a part of the salon culture during the conversations. Um, like I said, I was just around um older concepts, um holistic principles, and so it just naturally kind of came like this is just what we do, like we are always honoring the holistic aspects of us, of each other.
Speaker 1:Okay, I love that. Yeah, what inspired your passion for bridging the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual aspects of beauty? Beauty, um, well, it's hard, like I said, to separate, in my opinion, those things because for us, as black folk, hair black, never black. You know, hair has never just been just hair, right? Um, especially when you look at african culture, when you look at our culture, we look at indigenous traditions, beauty is so tied to our identity, it's so tied to the way that we resist in this world, is tied to our healing, um, and even just like our rejuvenation, like for our souls, for our spirits, and there's many ways that we honor those things within our culture and hair just happens to be one of those, like you know you see, the.
Speaker 1:You know the memories of like being on the porch getting your hair braided. You know like going to your grandma's house to have some tea. You know like these conversations, these house to have some tea. You know like these conversations, these moments where we get to nurture each other. It's hard to separate that, and so my work is just like bridging that gap and even just speaking to that.
Speaker 2:Mm, hmm.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so it sounds like you grew up in the healthy environment of nurturing and taking care of your hair, no matter the texture. Yeah, because unfortunately, in our race we can face some texturism as well, and it's not always like that, you know, for you know some of us, you know I'm I feel like I'm fortunate to have had the experience that you have had. But I've had, you know, guests on the show who have had the exact opposite encounter, some of this in my chair, where, you know, psychologically, you know, some of us have not been able to have that nurturing and that upbringing of loving their hair, no matter what the texture is. I don't know if you ever had that. Have you ever had that where you had to coach a client through learning to accept what naturally caused out of their scalp and, um, how was that? If you ever had to do that, yes, um, I have to do it quite a bit right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's really uncommon for, um, I feel like today is more practice for us too, as black women, if we have daughters and if we're in the industry as cosmetologists. We are now trying to really help reverse that sock, that unhealthy emotional connection that most black women have with their naturally curly hair. You know, yeah, it's only a few of us out here that actually got the experience like that you just described. You know, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a real thing. I often come in contact with people who are coming in and they're doing this thing, where they're trying a new thing. What's the new thing?
Speaker 2:Like the natural hair, like maybe they're transitioning.
Speaker 1:Okay, gotcha, yeah, like that that's a new thing. What's the new thing? Like the natural hair, like maybe they're transitioning, okay, gotcha, yeah, like that's the new thing. Like, oh, I'm going to actually just show up the way I am, like that's the new thing. And so it does turn into this whole therapeutic thing where we're talking about the psychology, we're talking about the spiritual aspect, we're talking about your lifestyle. We're talking about the spiritual aspect. We're talking about your lifestyle, you know, especially working holistically, like we're talking about what you're eating, what you're thinking about, what you're reading. You know, absolutely yeah.
Speaker 1:It's often, though and that's why hair is this portal and gateway to actually do all of these things Like, yeah, are they receiving the information or have you ever had anyone to? Just you just know it's deeper than what you can, you know, assist with. A lot of the times they're very receptive. Good, I don't have too many people that are not Um, a lot of the times they're very receptive. Good, I don't have too many people that are not Um, and yeah, they're. They're a lot of time coming because of a journey that they've been on already. So, um, you know, as they get to us, we're kind of one of those stops on that journey. So like they already understand some things about themselves that have made them want to try this and want to embrace their natural self, so they're kind of already privy to that.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we are on the front line, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, literally on the front line right. Yeah yeah, literally, why do?
Speaker 1:you think hair is so deeply connected to self-identity, especially in textured hair communities. I mean, our hair is legacy. So that's how I look at it is our hair holds these stories, our practices hold these stories, and so hair is just the physical appearance of these things.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:It is for sure. I love how you use that as an analogy. It's like the internalism, yeah, and the hair is like the external of. You know these stories, you know and even the consciousness. Absolutely, you care to like elaborate more on that? I like the direction that this is going in. Yeah, um, so, as we know, like, how we present ourselves has a lot to do with where we are psychologically, where we are spiritually, even like you see, the Rastafari people with the locks and they just let it go.
Speaker 1:And it's just, I'm free, I'm not, I'm not going to be bound by aesthetics, but also like it's a dope aesthetic. So right, it is it. It definitely is, yeah, for sure. Then you got the um people down in florida who got the wicks going but it's a.
Speaker 1:Thing yeah, it's a thing. Um, they're honoring their haitian ancestry thing. So we've always done this, and then you take it over to the continent. Before we even got here, hair has always been like oh okay, you're a part of this clan of people. Oh, you're royalty. Oh, you do this, like. So it always has been this big thing for our identity. It's never been just hair, that's right.
Speaker 2:Girl I had to.
Speaker 1:I was like let me bring it out of her Girl elaborate on it. Educate please, because I knew what you were talking about, but it's only because I'm in the industry and you know we studied the history, you know but, for a listener?
Speaker 1:they may not. So that's why I was like come on, elaborate on that, drop the gems and let them know this is so historical, for real. It's so many layers and that's why you can't just deal with just the hair as in just a hairstylist, or go to people that even just view it as that, because you will miss so much where there's opportunity for so much growth. Yeah for sure, love that. Thank you, no problem, that was a great answer, thank you. What are some of the most common emotional struggles people face when dealing with hair loss? When?
Speaker 2:dealing with hair loss.
Speaker 1:Definitely it's a lot of shame, a lot of grief and sometimes even a sense of worthlessness and visibility, right and just internal struggle. You know, it's, it's, it's a thing because it is so tied to our identity, so when we are experiencing hair loss, it can feel like I don't know who I am without this hair, without me being able to express it. So, yeah, it's, it's. It can be seen as a loss of power, I know, and so my work is to Help with that transition. Oh, sidebar, I'm also a doula. Oh, my gosh girl, you're just like this healer. Yeah, like you. You you want to heal and help. Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 1:Yes, so yeah, thank you but, yeah, helping with transitions is something that I um I, so this is just one of them. When people experience hair loss, it is a deeply emotional thing, but it also can be an empowering thing, and that's where the transmutation comes in. And that's what I like to focus on is how are we going to use this as an opportunity to elevate ourselves, to honor where it is you are, because whatever has happened has led you here, and so it's really acceptance. At that point, let's take it a step further and just honor where it is you are currently. Currently, if it can be fixed, it can be fixed. If it cannot be fixed, well then let's go ahead and work on our acceptance piece.
Speaker 1:And so, again, it just goes straight back into the spiritual aspects, in the soul level, of how we feel beautiful, because I think, Because I think beautiful, and feeling that way is really just feeling in alignment, feeling connected. So when we feel disconnected, we feel like, oh, I'm not identifying the way I want to, I can't express myself the way that I want to, I feel somehow disconnected from my purpose. It can be so many things and, like I said, it's just about coming back to center and knowing where the connection actually is? And yeah, just honor and experience. I love how you mentioned even if there is no solution to you know basically revive the hair follicles so that the hair can continue to grow. You was like that is also empowering as well, if you can really embrace that you know that's another self identity that you could really embark on, and I've seen so many women do it.
Speaker 1:It, you know, uh, due to whatever reasons, why, you know they lost their hair, um, the transition of watching these women, uh, grieve, you know, go through all the emotions of grieving, uh, like you mentioned, about not feeling like self, you know, because of their hair loss, and then just acceptance and then empowerment, you know, and that that's a lot, you know. You know, whenever I read these stories, whenever I watch these stories, I am just, you know it is. It will be hard for me. You know, uh, I would, if I had no choice, yes, I would definitely the goal would be to be empowered. I would not allow it to, um, you know, push me in a place of hiding. You know I would find ways to figure out how to accept it and move on.
Speaker 1:But I, I just love how you brought that to. You know, the forefront, you know where it's, not even just stuck at the hair loss. You know, sometimes we learn to empower and embrace ourselves through just not being able to recover the hair loss altogether. You know, some people they can do it and some people it's really hard. They're still struggling. You know. I wish I could find someone who has embarked on that journey to talk on the podcast so they can speak about the experience, you know, to help women that are currently struggling, trying to get to that place emotionally. Yeah, you know so. I love how you brought that up. Yeah, it takes a lot of self-reflection from the women and men that I have talked to that have in real time experienced hair loss.
Speaker 1:It was always more about the soul level wellness when it comes to hair loss specifically, like they have to go through a grieving time. They have to go through all of these different stages to be okay with the fact that they're losing this part of themselves, and what I've seen is that they really empower themselves with the idea of like. This is just where I am.
Speaker 2:This is cool.
Speaker 1:Okay, next phase of life. You know and not being so attached.
Speaker 1:We be so attached to how we appear, but it's really about, like I said that, interconnection. Absolutely, absolutely, yeah. Can you share an example of how mindfulness and self-care rituals have helped someone navigate hair loss? Yeah, yeah. So one woman that comes to mind, uh, and this is one that now she does speak to hair loss with a very empowered uh perspective, but, um, I remember when she first started to experience it, she had locks and, um, she would come into the salon and I would do her lock maintenance and I remember just telling her like, okay, I think you know the edges are doing a thing, we're going to try this, we're going to try that.
Speaker 2:Were they receding.
Speaker 1:They were receding. Yeah, they were thinning and receding and, yeah, I let her know. I also was like you know. I think you should get your blood checked and let's look into what you're doing nutritionally out just to see what was going on. And it just was something that was happening. Like they, they really couldn't figure out what was going on and so it just continued to thin and I worked with her on the nutritional aspect, but then there was things that started coming up through her process of finding out answers and coming to me and just doing the things that I would tell her to do at home.
Speaker 1:And you were approaching it like in a more herbal and holistic approach. What were some of those remedies that you were instructing her on? Yeah, so some of those things where we were doing things like affirmations or mirror work affirmations or mirror work. So I really wanted her to stay connected and grounded to herself throughout that transitional process of, okay, you might be losing your hair or we may need to be making some changes that will require some sacrifice from you, as in diet changes and things like that.
Speaker 1:So in doing that and going to the doctor, she did start to see hair growth at that point, and so that was just one of those aspects where I'm like okay, I think this might work. She was taking it into a deeper layer instead of just focusing on the aesthetics of it. And she did she. Her hair is full, fully restored, like she doesn't have any issues. Um, she did have to make some dietary changes, um, but she also did continue with like okay, how do I empower myself, um, with these affirmations, how do I even begin to embody them? She started to dance, she started to do things that brought her joy. Before, I think she was stressed, she had a lot going on.
Speaker 1:So it's that complete and total concern that we have to have um, and and just the full embodiment of what it means to be whole is, um, is deeply integral to how our hair show up, for sure, so it's not like the root cause may have been like lifestyle maybe. Okay, okay, mm-hmm, okay, okay, yeah, yeah, because you said there was nothing in that blood work. You know and see how important lifestyle can affect your hair. You know, yeah, it really can. You can be completely healthy from the inside, but mindfully. It's mind, yeah, mind-body connection Absolutely Will cause you to lose your hair. Yes, literally.
Speaker 1:You got to let that go. It's literally taken from your beauty at this point, absolutely. What are some common root causes of hair loss that people might not be aware of? Definitely stress, definitely stress. It definitely starves the hair follicles of nutrients. Hormonal imbalances, nutritional deficiencies, scalp inflammation, as we all know um, and that can be for many things, internal and external. We have the tight hairstyles, right, uh, glue wigs on the forehead. You know, like there's so many things there um, the heaviness and weight of our hair. You know, in certain locks I see that with locks too. But yeah, those are the main causes the lace, front wigs.
Speaker 1:The perimeter is just gone, just gone, but the rest of the hair is just growing and flourishing. You know um a lot of traction. It affects like one third of black women. I didn't know the math, so thank you for putting out the numbers you know, but um, that's what I see mostly traction, alopecia as far as hair loss go, and sometimes stress, you know yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Definitely stress. I think I see more of the stress working in textured hair, natural hair, like a lot of my work is working with the natural hair. So, yeah, stress is a huge one that I see and that's where I'm able to address that Because obviously, you know, with health concerns there's only so much we can do. But, yeah, the stress is the main thing. So I'm like stressing mindfulness to them, like, okay, can you please just for five minutes, if you could just do a deep breathing exercise before you go to work? Like work related stress, yeah, yeah, that's every day for them that's a lot.
Speaker 2:Yes, it is yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, what are some beauty rituals that support both emotional healing and hair health? There's so many things that come to mind. Girl, give us one, just give us one, one that you've seen had the most effect on your clients. One thing is, like I said, um mirror work and affirmations. Um, what are some affirmations that you um? Do they come up with these affirmations on their own, or do you have like a booklet of, or like like a notepad of, affirmations that you give out, depending on what the story is, that you are hearing behind the chair? Yeah, um, so a lot of time. It's intuitive. I'll send it to them directly from my mind.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so it's a little bit of channeling that message of, like, what do they need right now? Oh, it's that connection, cause while you're talking about things, I'm listening and for me, um, with my gifts, I can hear and know things.
Speaker 2:Um okay.
Speaker 1:So for me it's a lot of times more intuitive of like okay, this is what you should do.
Speaker 1:Um, and that's why I said there's so many things that come to mind but one of one of the things that come up the most common is a mirror work in affirmations um to for them to, like you know, actually do work around how they see themselves, um, and that is that is magical, just that alone, um. Because we're told how we should see ourselves a lot of the times, or we're going through, like we said, transitions where our how we see ourselves is changing, um, and so just being able to affirm ourselves um and make ritual out of it, Like.
Speaker 2:This is what.
Speaker 1:I'm going to do every single day, or I have my certain days of the week, um week, where I affirm myself, where I hold myself. But also there's things like I make a herbal hair tea where you can use that, you know, and it has herbs and ingredients that help to stimulate the follicles and do the things on that level. And then there's also spiritual components of like okay, this is a clear mind blend, so I want you to use this and your affirmations, and I want you to practice mindfulness, so it's a holistic thing. Okay, all right, I love that. So the herbal tea, are they to drink it or they apply it to their hair?
Speaker 2:Or they can do it or Apply it to your hair.
Speaker 1:Okay, okay, okay. Yeah, there are blends that I make for internal consumption. But yeah, I was talking about the hair tea that you can put on your hair.
Speaker 1:And kind of do it like in between your conditioner, deep conditioner or treatment mask. It's like a rinse I take like kind of like a rinse, okay, and with the tea, the way, how you incorporate the ingredients, is it based on the client's situation or whatever they're experiencing? So it's not like an all-in-one. It's catered and customized for that particular client, for their specific needs. Yeah, for the most part, but I do have a blend that I sell. That is just a all-in-one, like a basic formula, but yeah, if someone needed a little bit more, they could definitely get a custom. What is the name of the one that you sell? Clear Mind. Clear Mind. Okay, just got to put that out there just in case someone want to purchase. Yeah, you know what is the info. We need it. Yeah, so I'll be posting more about it here in the next couple of weeks.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:Okay. How can aromatherapy or essential oils be used to support hair and emotional well-being? I'm sorry, repeat that question. How can aromatherapy or essential oils be used to support hair and emotional well-being? Yes, love essential oils. I have them all in the space. Do you have favorite ones? I do. I love lemongrass.
Speaker 2:Me too. I think it's my favorite.
Speaker 1:Yes, it's so energizing. I do use a lot of peppermint and lavender in the slime. I do use a lot of peppermint and lavender in the salon. So yeah, for the calming and the clarity. I like the peppermint for the tingly feeling.
Speaker 2:Right yeah.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm Dee, I've been to a place where it's a clean salon, no chemicals, and I really enjoyed the shampoo session she also did mind work while I was there. Yeah, she did, she did, she did a lot of mind work um, a lot of um, um. It's been so long, but you know how you align your chakras, you know she did this chakra uh work.
Speaker 1:Is it reiki? Yes, it was, and I and I also got my hair done, so it was just like I love that. It was amazing, yeah and uh. What I really loved was like her intentionally just it's so simple but just taking a little bit of peppermint oil, rubbing it in her hands and just you know, basically just moving it around my face so I can inhale it and then begin to relax so she could do the work. Yes and um, I do do that during my uh scalp facials. So, yes, they get to experience that aromatherapy, like, okay, we're going to move into this next section and people love that.
Speaker 1:They be like, oh, it's an entire experience. You know, and I do believe receiving that level of intentional care not only just from your hair but also from your mind, like you've been talking about mindfulness, spiritual connection to yourself from within that can relieve so much cortisol. You know you could really you know you could really learn a lot from these sessions and, you know, try to adapt these to your day-to-day life. But I think that's like a really great way of self-care to make sure if you are experiencing hair loss due to stress that is like one of the best things that you like.
Speaker 1:Invest in the stylist that's offering it you know invest in a stylist that's offering those types of you know healings. You know, I think that would be so great, especially if it's nothing else. It's like you just stressed, you know, that's literally it, and I believe some people can't hold on to their hair and still be stressed. You know, I think it definitely depends on the biology of whatever is. You know, whatever it is that takes up to make your, make up your integumentary system.
Speaker 1:You know but um yeah, I think that would be so great for someone who is just, it's just, stress, nothing in your blood, nothing in your health, you know. I think that would be like a great recommendation.
Speaker 1:Well, you know, I um have a background in aesthetics as well and one of the things that we learn as an esthetician is that 90% of the things that we see on the skin are results of inflammation and inflammation one of the culprits. The response of inflammation first of all is stress. So stress not only on an external level, but stress internal. That's why we have to go into the nutrition, that's why we have to go into the diet, because what are you even eating that stress you out and raise your cortisol? Yeah, so for me, that's why it goes a little deeper, because the understanding of what inflammation even is and we can think like, oh, that's just a health issue and now it's separate. No, bring it right back, because how did we get to that health issue? Right, right, and we have to get to diet. We got to get to nutrition, then we got to get into okay, well, you in the food desert, we looking at the political things of it. Right, right, right, what changes do you need to make?
Speaker 1:These things have always been a thing for us. Like you hear a matter of CJ Walker and how she came to make her product. She was addressing scalp issues. Right, we still have scalp issues. We still have scalp issues, hair loss she was addressing that.
Speaker 1:So, these things have always been a thing from different angles. So yeah, just being mindful as practitioners that you know it's just deeper. It sure is, yep, with you you do offer locks as a service at your salon, correct? Yes, do you ever experience where you have a client where at the base is thinning and they are experiencing hair loss? Yep, and you know, of course, down the shaft of that lock is heavy In your practice?
Speaker 1:Have you noticed that it's because the lock is heavy and it's thinning the hair at the base, or is it that the hair is just not growing in as dense as it was once before, or both? Uh, yeah, mostly that that there's been a shift in the hair growth. Um, I don't. I mean, if their hair is like really long, I'll start to see that traction alopecia, but otherwise I honestly see more of where the hair growth has just shifted throughout the process. That could be for a couple reasons. I know a lot of times with Black men and their locks I see a lot of. I forget the name is. Is it DHT? No, there's a condition that I've learned about where the psychological um disorder that is going on is that they are twisting their hair back and forth because of anxiety.
Speaker 1:Right, yeah, for soothing, for soothing. That's actually what I see the most in Black men with locks is there's anxiety and I'm just twisting, twisting, twisting.
Speaker 2:And they're stressing those follicles out.
Speaker 1:Yes, and it's breaking off you know it's just, it's just one hand break off. Um, I had one client who had his whole side, was pretty much gone, and as I'm like looking, I'm like okay, and he brought in a bag of locks like can you? Oh my gosh oh so you do do uh, repairing too okay yes, yes, and uh, he sat on there.
Speaker 1:We both just looked at each other. I said, so what is this, right, what you've been doing, what you've been doing, what's going on, yeah, so I, um, I started to ask some questions because I'm like, okay, so what you eating, what you did? Okay, cool, how you feeling all right. And as we began to talk, and he's talking about just where he is in life and you know, considering getting married and the stress of that, and you know, I'm in a transition, I'm a new father I'm like, ok, I'm making ends meet, like all these things.
Speaker 1:Ok, stress, ok, how do you deal with that stress? Like you know, I don't, I'm not doing the things that I normally would do. Do you deal with that stress? Like you know, I don't, I'm not doing the things that I normally would do. So, as we're talking, I just noticed that he has what I would consider like anxiety. You know, um, and I have been trained through psychotherapy to understand mental health, through hair, mm-hmm, and so I was able to identify that and I was like, you know, do you experience anxiety at any point?
Speaker 2:It's like, yeah, bad, my anxiety bad, you know, and I'm like I'm not laughing at his struggle.
Speaker 1:I'm just laughing at the delivery because it's just, I feel like that's how we talk. That's how we talk. It's bad, it's bad. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:I'm all it's bad man. I said oh. I said okay. So what do we do? What you been doing? You been doing your music. I know you into music, I ain't doing that, I doing that. I said okay. I said so you sleep on this side. He told me no, I'll just be playing with my hair. Yeah, I was like okay. So. I was like okay, so this, this is that, but yeah yeah it's.
Speaker 1:It's so many layers, we gotta know what questions to ask. You do you absolutely do it's uh, it's always uh backtracking? You have to backtrack in order to find the root cause, in order to even fix the problem and provide a solution. You know, and um that consultation, you can be there for a good 30 minutes trying to figure out what is the problem, because you can't help them if you can't backtrack. You know, if they don't recall, remember what they do, and sometimes you do this so mindlessly when you're twirling in your hair.
Speaker 1:That's a mindless thing, you know. Even I do it at the back of my neck. It's so soothing, you know black women too, yeah yeah, it's very soothing.
Speaker 1:I blame my cousin, though, because when I was little like she would she was my older cousin, she was more like a big sister, and she would play in my hair and she always would take the the neck area and like, give me little strokes, and it's so soothing. So now I do it to myself and it's, and it's. It really is a thing. Like you know, when we uh look at the hair from a scientific perspective like this literally is our extension of our nervous system, right, so it literally goes up there, right. It makes so much sense. You know. I still blame her, though, because I'm like if she'd never done it, I would have never been, you know, so inclined right and it feels great.
Speaker 1:And then I have to be like stop, you know, because I mean it's, it's, it's just a thing, you know, I don't, I don't be like you know. Okay, stop doing that, because I understand it's a soothing thing.
Speaker 1:But if you could find a little spot. Yeah, even with my clients. They'll be sitting in the chair and we're consulting, and I'll see them grab like that sideburn area, yeah, and they're just twirl, and I'd be like stop. They'd be like okay, okay, I quit, I quit, I quit. I just had to lay it out, like you know. I understand this, but this is the result. So I just want you to be aware and you make your choice. That's exactly. Yeah, that's it, that's all you can do, because when they leave, yeah, there's only so much we can do, you know yeah, you just hope that I did suggest you go see a therapist.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like, yeah, you know, just to get back grounded. You know something, some stuff is so temporary, especially like getting married. You know one day you're gonna be married, so that stress will be gone. Yeah, you know, stepping into, stepping into fatherhood I think that's going to be a forever stressor. You got to learn how to manage your stress. Absolutely yeah, transition you know it is what it is. You know, oh, yeah, yep, go ahead and accept this where you at For real. Yeah, go ahead and accept this where you at For real. Yeah. What's the importance of hydration and detoxification in maintaining healthy hair? Definitely, water is life. Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2:How do you feel?
Speaker 1:about oils, because there is so much controversy on the internet amongst the black hair community where it's like don't use pomades, don't use oils. This is suffocating your scalp. This is suffocating your hair.
Speaker 2:It's so much.
Speaker 1:It's right. Tell me what you think about that. You know, I feel like I shouldn't throw the baby out with the baby bathwater. I think be out with the baby, uh, bath water. I think I think that there's reason. We have always used butters, oils, and I think that it's still relevant. I think, yeah, like what the heck? You know we got that's. That's part of our hair ritual. Another thing is the science of how this works. Okay, you have the hydration and now, yes, you have to seal in that moisture.
Speaker 1:Or you'll get you know water loss.
Speaker 2:You don't want that.
Speaker 1:Especially when we're in conditions where it's warmer or even extreme cold. Yeah, environmental is very important to consider, for sure. Yeah, I think it has a lot to do with that. If you're in a place where it's super warm, okay, maybe you just use the oil, not a pomade you needs in the moment.
Speaker 1:I know there's a lot of curly hair professionals who are completely against it. They're mostly curly hair professionals, right, and in some cases I can understand why they feel this way. However, for us kinky, coily girls, uh, where our hair is so vulnerable and it lacks so much moisture because it's so kinky and coily, it's really challenging to moisturize because these curls are running in so many different directions, unlike if it's a looser pattern, you can just apply it, move, move on. Hair stays moisturized. Literally. Different folks yeah, absolutely. And so when they push the narrative, sometimes it's like I don't disagree, but I don't agree either. It just depends on what the client needs. Most of Black women, we're looking for length and density retention. We're not really focused on curly hair. That's usually not the number one priority for Black women. So you cannot push that narrative, depending on the goal for the client, you know.
Speaker 2:And yeah.
Speaker 1:Now, if you want to embrace your curls, I would say no, because pomades are heavy, it's gonna be heavy, it's heavy. It can also stretch the curl pattern because it is so heavy. Um, it can suffocate it a little too, depending on you know, uh, where you at and what you want, what's your desire you, you know.
Speaker 1:So there literally is different strokes for different folks, depending on what your goal is Like. I would not recommend you to not use oil. And you have locks, you know, like crazy work, I wouldn't do that. I would not do that. Go ahead and lock that in. Yes, for sure yeah, but I will say you know making sure it's the right ingredients. You know absolutely. Thank you for touching on that too.
Speaker 1:Come on keep going yeah yeah, so, like you know, our head is is is very, very, um precious, and so we don't want to. You know our follicles, they go right into the bloodstream, you know so forth, so we want to make sure that it's medicine going in we don't want to make sure, we want to make sure that it's not toxic to our system, our endocrine disruptors and things like that.
Speaker 1:We don't want that. So, yeah, we want to make sure that it is medicine that's going in or something that actually can be used by the body. Absolutely Thank you for that. Yeah, for someone struggling with hair loss, where do you recommend they start their healing journey? Um, definitely start with grace oh, I love that.
Speaker 2:Start with acceptance, start with um courage. Be gentle with yourself.
Speaker 1:Look at what's happening internally and externally. Look at where you are in life.
Speaker 2:Look around and really take into account what that means for you and why certain things are showing up. Stress diet. Most importantly, small changes done consistently create big transformations.
Speaker 1:So yeah, starting with small things shifting the diet, shifting stress levels, doing things that honor you faithfuls, doing things that honor you, and that may even be making that appointment to go see the dermatologist or go see the doctor to address, maybe, finally, an issue that you have been carrying Right.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, I would say, start with grace Absolutely, because we can be so hard on ourselves and you know I know you mentioned shame earlier Like you start to feel shame and you also, you know, like kind of self-blaming, like what did I do? You know, what did I do, what I didn't do, like, you know, going through that mind space, I must have did something wrong, right. So that's why, when you mentioned grace, I'm like, yes, grace is very important whenever you are experiencing, you know, an impact such as hair loss. Yeah, you got to be patient with yourself and be nice to yourself, like you mentioned, be gentle, you know all those things that you mentioned, and even for my girls who are trying to accept wearing their natural curly hair, because that's a whole transformation within itself. You know, I always oh hi Close the door please.
Speaker 1:My children. I love it. We keeping that in. Okay, it don't supposed to be perfect, I love that. I wish he would have said something. I know one month okay, I don't want to mess up the recording. It's okay, we're almost done anyway. Okay, can you hear them? Yeah, it's okay. This is my real life. I'm a mommy. Yeah, we're gonna leave that. I love it. We're gonna leave it. I'm not even gonna going to tell Bryce to cut it.
Speaker 2:It's like keep it rolling, yeah, keep it rolling.
Speaker 1:This is a raw footage that y'all are receiving right now. This is real. This is who I am. Yeah, we're not cutting it at all.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:What's one key piece of advice you would give to someone who feels discouraged about their hair? Back to grace, but also approaching the journey with patience and love and just knowing that, like you are a whole person, like how you are showing up, isn't even scratching the surface of all that you are, so taking that power back to say whatever it is, you know. However, I look today is okay, like right, because this is me, real life. Hey, right, this is really a journey. So, um, yeah, just patience and love on yourself, right? Do you ever have to share hair stories to let them know you're not alone? You know, have you ever had to share a hair story to make them feel relatable?
Speaker 1:So, it can help, you know, with also moving forward in this new journey. Yeah, I share my own stories. So you suffer from hair loss, not hair loss. I did suffer a bit of not like complete hair loss. I did suffer a bit of not like complete hair loss. I have suffered from, like postpartum hair loss. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, oh, yeah, that I talk about all the time.
Speaker 2:Can you?
Speaker 1:share that story Like walk us through your story. You know of how you dealt with that emotionally and even though it's temporary, it's still a thing. It's still a part of what you experienced, right? It doesn't?
Speaker 2:feel good in the moment.
Speaker 1:No, it can be shocking. It can be shocking especially that's one thing that people don't really tell you. When you have it, they don't tell you your hair just fall out and you're like why is my hair falling out? Wait, y'all didn't tell me that Hold on.
Speaker 1:Right. So that was. That was kind of shocking, um, but once I got over the shock of, oh my God, is this happening? Cause I think it for me, it took a minute to really see that that's what it is Right, because I was like, oh I don't know, maybe my hairstyle just not popping the way I want it to. Yeah, where did you notice the hair loss first? Was it around your perimeter? Yeah, that's where mine was too. It started around my perimeter.
Speaker 1:And you know this area of the temple area, the edge right there, that is when you look at traditional Chinese medicine or even African traditional medicine.
Speaker 1:They can break down the head into quadrants where they are representative of certain parts of the body, and so when you get into this area where a lot of postpartum loss happens, that is actually it's telling you specifically a hormonal thing. Oh okay, yeah. So for me it was like oh okay, I see, I know, and now I'm going to address it. So I actually started to do hormonal therapy with herbs.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, I started to incorporate more like maca fruit my diet into my supplements.
Speaker 1:I started to use horsetail. Oh yeah, good one, yeah, sure. So doing things like that ashwagandha for the mood and for the hormones as well, yeah, but yeah, I started to do that and also I just had to really accept that that was a part of the journey that I was currently on.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I did just give life.
Speaker 2:And so.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to focus on this loss as a loss, but rather a um, a omen that I have passed through this rite of passage. Right Like this is kind of what happened and it made me, like I said, think about how I'm caring for myself, and so it was always. It turned into a deeper thing because how am I caring for myself now that I've given life? Let me put back my nutrients, Let me put back my stuff and really something. It's just a part of your journey. Yeah, you know, I try to advise them to keep taking hair vitamins, but even hair vitamins still will A minute. It takes a minute and sometimes it just don't work, you know, and I just always have to remind them that it will pass. It will pass For me. I cut my hair. I was just not dealing with all of the breakage. I couldn't. It was like an eyesore.
Speaker 2:I did too, yeah, it was like an eyesore.
Speaker 1:The hair is extremely combative. It don't want to behave. You can't style it. It don't lay to behave. You can't style it. Don't lay down right. It's too weak and vulnerable to receive hairstyles with tension, so you really just need to leave it alone.
Speaker 2:You know, yep.
Speaker 1:Literally.
Speaker 2:Yeah, release the control.
Speaker 1:That's another thing. Right, yeah, for sure. Yeah, it just was happening. Yeah, except it's like I did cut the sides of my hair off, just was happening. Like I did cut the sides of my hair off and I was like you know what? We just going to rock this Mohawk, right, and I'm going to do all the things. And still, when I go out, people like what I love your hair and so it actually empowered me. I turned you know you can turn it into this thing where actually I'm going to embrace it.
Speaker 2:I got different earrings now I'm about to adore myself Like. This is just what it is.
Speaker 1:It's such an experiment once you empower it. You know, if you just let it be, you'd be surprised once you let go of that control, like you mentioned. You'd be surprised how creative your brain can get when you just let it go, because I never thought in a million years that I would ever rock a pixie. By choice I would never rock a pixie, and I know it was super cute. When she got done, I loved it. You know it was hard. It was just trying to adjust to the new look, you know, yeah, but um, and I loved it even more as it grew out, because I had the longer bangs and I kept the back and the sides tapered and I had, like a Bieber, a Justin Bieber look going on. It was just more of a feminine touch though, you know, and I received.
Speaker 1:Right, I received so many compliments and I would wear these cute little fedora hats and go buy jewelry. You know, it was just like I was just adding to that aesthetic and I really embraced it. You know it was hard but I managed to get through it, you know and that's it.
Speaker 1:It's a, it's a journey. So you go through the process of okay, how do I find my power in this? And I'm just gonna rock it, I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do that, you know. But yeah, it's still a journey. You still may have those moments of sadness, still may experience that grief, but it is a journey that you will get over and get through and the hair will grow back because it's postpartum. It's temporary, so it will grow back.
Speaker 2:Yes, just find something to do in between you know Very good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, how can people connect with you and learn more about your work? So, right now, you can follow me on Instagram at the Root and Honey, and, yeah, that's kind of where I'm at right now. You can book a session, uh, or you can join one of my upcoming workshops. I actually am doing a workshop with a lovely black woman therapist, uh, and partner with another co-stylist to do a series called Black Women and Mental Health, where we'll be discussing Black women, mental health and hair. So, yeah, I'm just going to keep it rolling. So, yeah, follow me on Instagram. Website information TikTok. So I don't have a website right now, but working on that. Like I said, I do have the products and things. They've been sold locally. I'm actually expanding to online this spring. So it's a lot of work, huh Lots of work, yeah, I've been there.
Speaker 1:That's why I stopped. I was like I'm good, I'm tired. Yeah, you know what, for me, it's about uh, balance with everything that I'm doing, so I don't put too much on myself. So I'm like you know, it's small batch, handcrafted. I love that. It would. I can give that's right and that's the only way quality results are produced.
Speaker 1:Let's just be honest and it's a lot for us to balance. We wear so many hats behind that chair, you know so. I love the fact that your balance is so intentional and you are also very aware of you needing that balance, and it's not about just pushing something out. You want it to be right. You know so that the customer or whoever is going to invest in you, they're receiving it at top tier you know, yeah, that's important to me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love that, yes, well, thank you so much for carving time out of your beautiful Sunday because I see the sun coming in through the window.
Speaker 1:So I know it's a beautiful Sunday for y'all. You know it's sunny, but it's snowy out here in Detroit. Oh, really, we in the windstorm. Yes, oh, it's cold today, but it's not snow. I mean, it's Texas. Yeah, yeah, I wish I could enjoy that heat. No, you don't. You say no, no, you do not. It is life-threatening. Oh, let me tell you, it is life-threatening. I'm not.
Speaker 1:During the summer, we all, we barely make it but listen, that's all detroit. Oh, my god, yeah, I'd be like dang. Yeah, well, hopefully some of that sun melted a little bit, you know. Yeah, so y'all can get out and enjoy some of that beautiful, refreshing air. It's nothing like it, you know, nothing like it. I appreciate it. You're welcome, thank you. Thank you. What an enlightening conversation. A huge thank you to Empress for sharing her wisdom on the power of holistic beauty and the deeper connections we have with our hair. Her insights on mindful self-care, herbal remedies and creating intentional beauty spaces truly show how hair is more than just an aesthetic it's a reflection of our inner and outer well-being. If you love this episode, be sure to check out Empress' work through Root Honey, where she continues to educate and inspire through beauty and wellness. And, of course, don't forget to subscribe, rate and share hair. What I'm saying with fellow beauty lovers Until next time, take care of yourself and your hair with intention. See you soon. You, you, you.