Hair What I'm Saying
"Hair What I'm Saying" is created to share real life experiences with real people in the beauty industry to promote healthy relationships with consumers and Beautyprenuers. We will get into the nitty gritty of the backend of hair/salon business to help consumers understand why certain policies are implemented in order to sustain a healthy balanced salon environment for both parties, while consumers share their unprofessional and challenging experiences behind the chair. The goal is to bridge the gap to understand one another's perspective in hopes of clarity and unity.
Hair What I'm Saying
Redefining Confidence: Pole Dancing, Makeup, and Owning Your Beauty"
You can catch this episode visually on YouTube. Click Here to watch!
What happens when beauty meets movement? Join us for an enriching conversation with Jessica Washington, a gifted makeup artist and pole dancing coach, who illustrates the transformative power of embracing one's unique beauty and movement. Jessica shares her compelling journey into pole dancing, ignited by a client's inspiring story of vitality and self-discovery. We explore how makeup and pole dancing can shatter confidence barriers and empower women to reclaim their beauty on personal terms, offering a supportive space to express and celebrate their authentic selves.
Ever wondered how to navigate societal beauty standards while staying true to yourself? We'll explore this and more, discussing the challenges of external expectations and the cycle of self-comparison. Jessica opens up about the fulfilling journey of embracing authenticity over superficial fixes, fostering a mindset of self-compassion and inner growth. By sharing personal anecdotes and teaching experiences, this episode emphasizes nurturing the inner self and finding true fulfillment in self-worth rather than seeking external validation.
Curious about how to enhance your beauty routine or fitness journey with mindful practices? Discover the empowering benefits of mindful makeup application and pole dancing, where self-expression and personal growth are at the forefront. Jessica discusses how platforms like Pinterest can inspire without dictating self-worth, and the liberating experience of prioritizing what feels good. Listen in as we highlight the importance of embracing all aspects of oneself, building communities of growth and support, and committing to consistent self-confidence and self-acceptance.
Connect with Jessica Washington by following the links below:
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Website
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Welcome to my mommy's podcast, hair what I'm Saying, where we dive deep into beauty, entrepreneurship and self-expression. I'm your co-host, magic Stewart, and today we are thrilled to have an amazing guest with us, jessica Washington. Jessica is not only a talented makeup artist, but also an empowering pole dancing coach. In this episode, we're exploring the powerful connection between self-confidence, beauty and movement. We'll discuss how makeup can be an accessory to enhance your natural beauty and how pole dancing has helped so many women, including Jessica, break through confidence barriers and truly embrace themselves. This conversation is about reclaiming your beauty on your own terms and feeling empowered in every way.
Speaker 2:Welcome to the Hair what I'm Saying podcast. I'm your host, Kenetra Stewart. Today we have Jessica Washington of Jessica Blends joining us. Welcome, Jessica, how are you? I'm so excited to be here.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh, thank you for having me, of course. Thank you for carving time to come share with us. Oh my gosh, thank you for having me, of course. Thank you for carving time to come share with us. Oh my gosh, no, this, this is the perfect way for it to happen. I'm so happy that it's with you. Yay, so comfortable. Excuse me if I get a little weird no, be yourself, be yourself yeah no, I'm like, are you sure today, besides excited, what else like?
Speaker 2:are you chilling today? Besides excited, what else? Like, how are you feeling? I feel good. Usually I'm up and I'm rushing to get everybody else ready, and it was fun because we got to get ready for everybody, but I'm like dang, I got to get dressed too.
Speaker 2:I got to be cute, I got to make sure I look good on the camera. So that is so true. Today you had to pamper yourself to get here. What did that feel like? The roles being in reverse? I think I'm lucky because we're so similar and I'm so used to doing your makeup, like I don't have to think so hard about what I'm going to do for you. I could just get up and flow. But I'm like, oh, I sat down to do my eyes and I looked up and I was like I lost time. It just disappeared. Like I promise you I had 15 minutes 30 minutes ago.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's how it, is it just?
Speaker 2:disappeared. But we're here. We're at One Piece. Yeah, got my coffee. I'm good, I'm good, all right, cool, well, we're going gonna jump right into it. Let's just get on into it. So what drew you to pole dancing after practicing makeup professionally for so long? Girl, at first I did not want to do it, because which one pole dancing or makeup?
Speaker 2:I was like girl, wait a minute. So you know, I work with my partner photographer and, um, a pole instructor. She came in for some headshots and while we were doing her her photo shoot, I was like, wow, like this is really inspiring. She was in her 50s and she was doing it to keep herself young and moving. I was like I think I want to do this, yeah. And she was like, well, you can't wear lotion and the grips hurt and it's a whole lot of work. I said, oh, okay, no, thank you, no, thank you. And then after about another year, we got together again and I was like, okay, I need something to where I can get out the house, I want to be around ladies, I want to work out, but I want to be in a safe space. And when I went back to think of pole, I'm like, okay, I can be a little sexy, I can work on being strong, it's small, I can just hang out with my girlfriends. This is a place where I can be silly and fall over and mess up and not have to worry about being perfect or getting it right, and so after I started, it was just that was it for me, that was it so like from
Speaker 2:day one. Oh yeah, oh yeah. And I, that was it for me, that was it so, like from day one. Oh yeah, oh yeah. And I was lucky to get started with a partner like. I met her in class. We both started around the same time and then after a while it started to be like, okay, girl, are you gonna come, like, are you there? And if I was good at something, she might needed some help, or if I needed help, she would be really good at it, so we could feed off of each other really well. And I know a lot of people try to find, like, a gym partner before they get to the gym. But finding your person there already, yeah, we got to grow so much together so it just started to be fun. Yeah, and then we're still sore afterwards. Yes, indeed, because that's so much upper body work, so much strength, so much core.
Speaker 2:Yes, so you are absolutely going to be hurt yes yes, we're moving muscles and using muscles that we wouldn't have really thought about before, and then, when you're getting up the pole and you're trying to grip and support yourself, like that's a different sort of pain.
Speaker 2:Trying to hold your whole body weight with the skin meat. Oh y'all guys, oh my gosh. And then you're ashy and you're sticky, and so after a while I discovered low flow, which is everything standing and on the floor, so that alleviates a little bit of the stickiness and having to grip. But you still need that full body engagement and awareness to be able to move fluidly. So that's what I like I like to be like water Gotcha, okay, okay, what's her name? What's her name? Tyler? Oh yeah, whatever. Yeah, yeah, oh yeah, whatever.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, that girl.
Speaker 2:Yeah, girl, so that makes sense. I would have never thought to put that much thinking into like not wearing lotion because you don't want to slip and fall. You know, I would have never even thought that Girl I'd have came greased down just to make sure I'm not ashy, because you know, like you are wearing tight, fitting clothing, that's really exposable. Yeah, so I'm not trying to be in there, and so that's the next thing too when you're going up the pole you do really have to be exposed because you need your skin out so that you can grip. But I wasn't super comfortable with having my cheeks out and I mean I like doing the moves, but after a while I was like, okay, I don't have to do this, let me, let me find my space. So the second thing with low flow, I love I can wear pants if I want to. Okay, um, I can. Well, you do need your, your arms out a little bit, but you can be a little bit more covered, and so I can get away with some lotion on my knees.
Speaker 2:Gotcha, because those are those important parts them, them elbows, them knees and them ankles, ma'am, ma'am, ma'am, and we're moving and you're opening yourself up. Everybody's seeing every little bit. Yeah, yeah, absolutely yes. You've expressed through content and also to me, how pole dancing has helped you build self-confidence in many different ways from makeup. Can you elaborate more on that? Yeah, so with pole again, because of the strength, movements and just learning how to be aware of your body as you're moving and engaging around the pole, a lot of those movements require you to start trusting yourself a lot more, not just building your strength, but trusting that you can hold yourself in this position, that you can squeeze tight enough so that you don't fall over, or, you know, you can maintain that grip even though it hurts, even though, like, it's sticky or it's uncomfortable.
Speaker 2:And in those moments I found like I was able to really surprise myself or really proud of myself. Like dang, I did that. That hurt, I was scared, but I did it. I might have looked like a you know, a wet duck, but I did it. You know what I'm saying. So, even if it's not cute the first time, like look it's, oh my god, it takes a while before it gets cute of course.
Speaker 2:You know it takes a while but just being able to be like dang. I was scared but I did it. Yeah, that hurt but I figured it out. That part feels good and then we can just figure out how to make it cute as we go. That's right, so you know it's like building the foundation first yeah you know it's gonna be raggedy, it's gonna be ugly at the bottom, you know but you have to get that first before you can master being all sexy and seductive with it exactly because being sexy and seductive is not it's, it's a byproduct, that's not what we're trying to do it comes after.
Speaker 2:You have that confidence and absolutely so, when we're building and we're focusing on us and we're like, yes, I did it, or that felt good, I'm gonna do it again. Yeah, or this is starting to feel comfortable, fluid, like normal for me then that sexiness is inevitable, absolutely so. That's what I always tell my ladies. Like we're not trying to be sexy, we're trying to be free.
Speaker 2:I want I don't want you to try to be cute. I want you to be silly just to get comfortable, exactly, and then, from that comfort, from that confidence, the sexiness is undeniable you're like it's inevitable okay. So when it comes to makeup, do you feel as though you? The confidence is, of course, very different, but in what ways will makeup different from poe? So, with makeup, makeup is very last step. It's, it's the outer layer.
Speaker 2:So when we're putting on our makeup, we already know where we're going, what we're showing up as we already have that, that confidence in that map, and the makeup is just the final layer to project that energy, to set the tone, like, okay, you see me and you know what to expect. I don't look like, you know what I'm saying, so you know, come correct. But the makeup washes off, that's. And through my years of being an artist, I met and I've listened to so many different stories of women who were looking for that confidence, who were looking for that self love, and seeing that transition from before makeup to with the makeup on, and then the brightness and how they show up on camera after that really hurt my heart when I thought of are you going to go back to normal when you can't do what I just did? Or if you can't recreate this, is it just because of the makeup or is this coming from somewhere real?
Speaker 2:So, with the makeup being the outer layer, I wanted to draw it in and say, okay, let's bring it into the body, let's really find the core of this, this confidence of this self-love, and work on all the other things that we feel like hold us back, like, oh, my weight, or I feel like I would look like this, or I feel like I can do like that, because it's never been a size thing. Of course, if you can do what you can do to make yourself feel the best, right, but it's about how you feel in your body and being aware of your body and how you move it and how you relate to it, like just loving yourself as you are right now and then learning how to move and and work with it. That stays with you. Yeah, so you would say that pole dancing is more interior and makeup is more exterior yes, got you.
Speaker 1:Yes, that's what I'm, that's what I'm here. Yeah, that's what it feels like.
Speaker 2:So I'm like, okay, let's take it a layer deeper, absolutely, so that beauty really comes from a place that's that's strong, that's secure, that's that's real, that's actually you From within. Yes, exactly so I'm like let's dig, let's pull it all up and again, be comfortable messing up, be comfortable falling over, be comfortable laughing at yourself, yes, and be comfortable not knowing what you might want to do next or what move might come next.
Speaker 1:But once you get there figure it out.
Speaker 2:So that's another thing that I love about low flow is all of the moves kind of stick together or they can transition into each other. So I don't like teaching a hardcore choreo you have to do this and that and this and that, like of course from time to time we do. But my goal is to help you find that flow. So I'll show a couple moves, make sure that the technique is good, and then when you get to a stopping point or a sticking point, I'm like okay, what does your body want to do next? What do you naturally, what do you feel it? And then we can kind of polish and move from there.
Speaker 1:So you'll know the pieces, but you might not know the journey, but it's your unique journey Exactly so.
Speaker 2:When you're in it, you can move, and when you get stuck, you can pause. But you know what your options are, absolutely.
Speaker 1:I love that.
Speaker 2:And that's. That's really what confidence is. It's like you may not know all the answers, but you know what you can do, and so when you find yourself in a position that you may not have expected, it's not about not knowing or being surprised that you're here. It's about knowing that you know what you can do. So you just figure it out.
Speaker 2:Did you find your confidence through pole dancing or was it introduced from the instructor, from when she, you know, from when, from whenever you done her makeup? So did she introduce it to you in that way? Or that was something you learned along the journey? Like wow, throughout this pole dancing journey, I'm actually learning how to, you know, build this self-confidence from within. Yes, so it was a little bit of both. Um, miss pat, she's, she's my instructor, she, she introduced it to me and she had her.
Speaker 2:Oh, yes, candy, pole fitness. Ok, candy fitness. I will send it to you to make sure we get it right, knd. And when I first met her because you know, usually when you think of pole dancers, you think of skinny minis and super sexy, like bombshells, and we're like yo, we're just here to enjoy it and hearing her story of how she retired and she got into it because she loved it and found her strength through that at you know, whatever age, right? Okay, this seems like fun. And then, as I started to go and be consistent and I started surprising myself, yeah, oh, I did that.
Speaker 2:Okay, and I'm like, okay, that feels good, those little wins really start to build up and then along the way, when I found low flow and I started rolling around the floor and kicking the legs up and all that, I said I feel so sexy right now, I love that. And so from there I was like, yeah, this is what we need. But it naturally flowed in because, working with um always being in a studio yeah, I'm always there pose like this, you know, stand like this, move your posture like this oh, you want to be sexy. We got to create this art, so the posing and the body placement was already familiar. It just we took it from being still to being move, in motion, being fluid, and that was, that was natural. That's good, that's good to know. So, yeah, all right, girl, okay. So how does pole dancing empower women, both physically, mentally?
Speaker 2:I feel like we covered it, right yeah but the empowerment really comes when you let yourself and I think that's the biggest thing that I've learned Again, I'm still, I'm still new and I'm learning. So all of my intro classes or my new ladies that come in I'm really big on in this space is I don't want to hear you talking about what you wish you look like. I don't want to hear you say, oh, I can't do that because I, I gotta lose that or that, there's none of that there. Yeah, I love, there's none of that there. It's just, you know, let go, and we're gonna try. And if you mess it up, that's fine, maybe next time.
Speaker 2:But I think the biggest thing that I try to help everybody learn is just let it go, let go. It's a very encouraging and uplifting environment. Exactly you know, it's not something that's very uh, structured yeah, that's what I'm hearing. It's a combination of um. It's not just what you're doing like the technique is that you'll learn that and like that'll come, but it's who you're becoming while we're doing this. We're not doing this to be sexy for anybody. I've never been a performer, so I can't speak in that area. I don't teach them in that area like you're performing for yourself.
Speaker 2:You are doing this for, and if you decide to share by all means, but you're using this to become more confident, more comfortable, more aware in your body, and that's what you're going to leave with, whether you get the move or not, you know. Whether you can learn the trick or not, you're going to get closer and closer to loving yourself and being more comfortable and confident in yourself. That's what's most important. Let's just be honest yeah, and being more comfortable, that's what's most important.
Speaker 2:Let's just be honest yeah, that's it, that's really it, and you can do that. Two-stepping, you can do that. Rolling on the floor, you can do that. You know, whatever method it is for you, because everybody doesn't dance, we just go off and karaoke. Some sit down and do their makeup and that works, or some are you. You know you want to paint on a canvas. It's not what you're doing, it's who you're becoming while you're doing it. That's right, I love it.
Speaker 2:What are some common misconceptions about pole dancing you would like to address? I think the main thing is that you have to be sexy first and that it has to be complicated. It doesn't even sexy and movement, or sexy physically, or both, both, okay, both. Because sexiness is not something that you can do, it's something that you are. And again, being in the photo space for 10 years, I've seen sexy come from all ages, races, shapes and sizes, and I've also seen the women who would be considered sexy naturally not really have it in them. And then you have to coax out that confidence or whatnot. So it's never how you look, it's how you show up and how you're comfortable and confident in your body. Girl, if you, if you feeling it. You know, you really feel it, girl. You can just take a couple steps around the pole and that sexiness will be where's my words? It will radiate like it's undeniable. Yeah, so it's not something that you can create. It's just how you show up, that's right.
Speaker 2:Have you ever had to coach someone like have you ever saw someone like struggling in your class? Okay, and you had to like coach them and not struggling with the movement, but like struggling internally, and you had to pull someone to the side to regroup and let them know what we're really here for? Yeah, not, usually that's me. You're regrouping yourself. Yeah, usually it's me.
Speaker 2:I have to step back and be like don't get too full of yourself. You know, sometimes you get comfortable going through the same things or you just start going through the motions, especially like when you know it, even as a makeup artist like, okay, it's just another makeover, or I know I can get through it. Or you go to class okay, it's just another class, I can get through it. Or I'm just gonna phone it in and go through the motions, and that's not what it's about. Like you have to come back and be like okay, don't, don't, don't get too full of yourself, don't get too big headed and also don't take yourself for granted and thinking that what you know and what you want to share isn't worth anything because it's simple to you, or?
Speaker 1:it's not really you.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, I got to pull myself back and say, yeah, it's, it's, it makes sense to you, but that's because that's your gift to share, that's right, and so don't belittle it. You gotta, you know, come correct. So I, I'm the one that needs to step out and say get back into alignment. I really basically regroup because it's like you feeling really great about what you're sharing. Yeah, oh, okay, so I was. I'm glad that you did speak on that. But what about for the women who are struggling internally, trying to, you know, get to where you are? Have you ever had to, you know, re-coach them and let them know, hey, I was where you were. This is gonna take some time. It's a journey, it's not a sprint, yeah, so have you ever had to had that experience with one of your?
Speaker 2:you know, I've had a few where we're going through and we're trying to get a move in, it gets into the I just can't. I don't know what's wrong with me. And I'm looking at you like yeah, and I'm like I don't care, like I care, but I don't care if you mess it up. And sometimes you have to take that pressure off because we feel like we have to be perfect, or she feels like I have to get this right, or even that I'm wasting time because or maybe somebody else is waiting. I'm like no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2:And again, those classes are always small so that I can pay that much attention to everybody, and I also like to have like a learning period so I can get to know what your strengths are, to kind of avoid a little bit of overwhelm. But when my ladies get to a point and they're like I just can't, I just can't. So okay, well, let's regroup, because you can just, maybe not this right now, that's right. And again, it's not about the move or the trick, it's how you're talking to yourself in that moment. So take the stress off yourself. I'm not needing you to do anything other than don't hurt yourself. There's no hard and fast choreo that you can mess up. There's nothing that you can mess up here, so step back and breathe yes and remember why you're here. You're having fun, that's right.
Speaker 2:If we got to move away from the polls and get silly for a minute and when I say silly, I'm going turn a song on, we're gonna dance and and just just have.
Speaker 2:I've seen it, I've seen it and I feel I take advantage of the fact that I'm I'm in charge of the class. So if I say, let's get weird, we're gonna get weird and let me be the leader because it doesn't feel as strange like if you're not doing it by yourself. Yes, so if I'm not taking it too seriously, if I can laugh at myself, I want you to be able to laugh, laugh at yourself. And if we got to regroup or change um focus, change our focus, so that you can let that out of your mind and then revisit it, well then let's do that because that's mostly what it is like it's just a shift in the focus.
Speaker 2:That's really it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean all of us have just a shift in the focus. That's really it. That's really it.
Speaker 2:I mean all of us have a time where we don't know our right from our left, like it's happening more often lately.
Speaker 2:Exactly so it's like how are you going to respond when you start feeling overwhelmed? So, besides the obvious societal beauty standards projected onto women, are there any others you've noticed that someone might overlook? Like, besides the usual, like you were stating, like some of your girls think that they have to look a physical, you know, or be in a physical shape in order to do pole dancing, especially the way how they present pole dancing. You don't typically see outside of the normal standard beauty, physical aesthetic on that pole. Yeah, and I think that's what it is like.
Speaker 2:I think we all started really conforming to the same sort of outward beauty standard, like if I look this way, then I can get a high value man, if I have my hair, if I do all of this, then I can attract what I want. Like the visual will bring in everything. And yes, as a makeup artist, I do know the power of presenting yourself and doing the makeup in the way to set a tone, but if there's nothing behind that, if there's nothing behind that, then it doesn't matter. So I think the trend that's really hurting us right now is focusing so much on the outside or focusing so much on quick fixes, topical fixes, that we never step back and really attack the core.
Speaker 1:The core Of what it is.
Speaker 2:That core feeling of how you really feel about yourself. It's not going anywhere until you address it Exactly. You can go get all these topical treatments like you mentioned.
Speaker 2:I mean the botox, the bdl whatever all of the above, it's gonna keep happening and you are still gonna feel the same way exactly that's right so I like to look at pole as an opportunity to practice being in that feeling, practice allowing yourself to flow, practice how you're going to talk to yourself when you mess up or when you're frustrated. And all the while you are tapping into your femininity, you are building your strength, you are being more aware and comfortable in your body that's right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that walks away with you now you walk through walmart differently.
Speaker 2:You got a different swish of your hips. You know your. Your shoulders are back, your posture is different and that doesn't wash off like the makeup does, but when you put makeup on top of that.
Speaker 1:I've seen it. I've seen it, it is it is that lives with you.
Speaker 2:And so that's all I wanted to really translate and to expand Like you don't have to, you know, be on the pole or you don't have to do it my way, but knowing that you have a method to practice and practice being who you want to be. It doesn't matter what you're doing, that's right. And then you know you can show up and do what you want to do. That's right, amen, sister, what advice would you give to women who struggle with comparing themselves to the social media beauty standards? Girl, get off of the damn phone. Just stop looking. Just stop Like there's nobody out there that's going to be able to tell you how to do it like you. What?
Speaker 1:you say there's nobody, get off the damn phone, put it down.
Speaker 2:Put it down, because you're going to search and look for inspiration. You're going to search and look for all of these other people doing their thing in their way, and that's why they're doing so well.
Speaker 1:Because they figured out their thing, their thing.
Speaker 2:And a lot of us want to look or searching for solutions before we even really have the right questions. Like you can go through and you can collect all these different ideas and data. You can be so smart, yeah, when it comes to style and all that stuff, but until you actually start applying it, until you actually start like digging into yourself and figure out what works for you, yes, you could end up looking and acting and behaving just like everybody else and you lose sight of who you are. So, yeah, if you're going through it and you're like I feel like it's get the, you know, as time progress, I just feel like it's getting worse because there are so many different visual platforms out here now, you know you have Pinterest, besides Instagram and TikTok. You have Pinterest, yeah, you know, and Pinterest will definitely lead you down a rabbit hole. For sure man lead you down a rabbit hole for sure.
Speaker 2:You know it's an. It's one of the I feel like slept on platforms that people don't want to acknowledge. But, being that we both have dabbled in wedding makeup hair and sometimes they send some of those pictures and you know it's like I'm deep in it my Pinterest. I have my Pinterest since I was like 13. My life is on Pinterest and I can go back through and I can see all of the stuff that I used to like and saved up and you can look through the themes and be like, OK, I know I really love this style but it took me until now and trying and failing and going back through it, I realized that what I loved didn't really love me back, or what I liked wasn't really for me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and if I would have growth, you just and that's, that's even, you know, just that that's that feels even better, like you actually can see your growth, you know, like you can go back and like look at your growth. You know, I'm saying, you hear what I'm saying, you hear what I'm saying.
Speaker 2:Oh my goodness. So using it as a tool, as like a scrapbook, that's perfect. But once you get into a loop and then a lot of the times we fall into like these limiting beliefs of I have to be it this way, or this is the only thing that works, or this is what people want, and then you start feeding into it. That's right. And if you can't achieve that, exactly because I was one of those girls, girl- if I yeah, we all are or have been.
Speaker 2:You know I, I will fall down, we, we get flat and I'm like what is wrong with me? Why am I? Why? And then you go back to the top. I'm searching through again, I'm trying to find some more inspiration, never actually putting in the work to do what I needed to do, to find me.
Speaker 2:And so using it as a tool to collect and find inspiration is cool to a point, you got to know when. To put it down and actually show up and start doing it for you, that's right, yes. To put it down and actually show up and start doing it for you, that's right, yes, it's. I feel like it's great inspirational pieces, but not for you to actually take that and adapt it and make it like this is what I want to do this is who I want to be like exactly, etc.
Speaker 2:Etc. But it's great for inspiration and that's it. Say keep it moving. How do you encourage your clients to view makeup in a way that enhances rather than define their beauty? Okay, I love this, so in two parts, it's how you put it on. So it's your mindset of taking your time to really love yourself, to breathe and to slow down and do it with a sense of yeah, do it with a sense of adornment, like I'm not doing this because I have to.
Speaker 2:I'm not doing this because I I hate my under eye bags. I'm not doing this because, you know, I broke out and I just can't, I can't leave the house without makeup because that's, that's absolutely not it. But doing it in a way of I feel good, like it's all in the intention of the application that changes it from I need to fix myself to oh, I'm just having fun.
Speaker 1:I love this.
Speaker 2:I'm just having fun, I love this and then, before we get to that, it's having the right products and the colors. You can be as dramatic or as natural as you want. If your color match is on point, if we are working with the right shades of blushes and eyeshadows and you have the basic formulations, it's like now we get to color inside the lines. Now I broke down all of the options and I just have what looks good on me. I don't have to think so hard about what I'm trying to do and I can just flow. You can get back into that flow, so that's how I find my groove within makeup. You set up your kit. You have what you know works for you and you know how you like your eyes done.
Speaker 2:You balance your contrast and all those good things, so you're not thinking too hard about formulations, so you actually can just breathe and chill and enjoy yourself and do your makeup, and then, when you're done, you're done. Just listening to that feedback, I feel as though that's how it should be taught from day one. That's how it should be taught from day one. If it was taught like that from day one, I could only imagine what could be really going on in the world right now. Yeah, you know, instead of like, because even when you get on YouTube and you are trying to find, you know, like, some tutorial to follow, you know, for whatever inspiration that you're looking for, they always approach it in a way, as you know, if you want to conceal your eyes or your you know, your eye bags or whatever in order to get fuller lashes, blah, blah, blah. You know, and that's kind of like a unintentional, negative talk. Unintentional, yeah, you know it, you know. Not negative. I want to stay negative, but it can be, because when I'm listening to you how you're encouraging, you know, women to apply makeup or approach makeup, it's more like just get the foundation and not necessarily the formula, but get the foundation, like, get the color matching right, you know, and then just build. Yeah, you know, that's what I love. I love like that feedback that you just said, because I feel like if it was taught in that way, so many people would actually enjoy it.
Speaker 2:Like me, I don't enjoy doing my makeup because of what you literally just said. Like, ok, I got to make my eyebrows a certain way and I got to. You know, I'm getting these bags. I ain't get enough sleep. Let me cover these bags instead of like girl, just have fun and apply the makeup. Have fun creating instead of like girl, just have fun and apply the makeup. Have fun creating Exactly Instead of covering something up, and then it won't be so daunting, which is why I've never enjoyed doing it or even trying to apply it. You know, and learn about it for me to, you know, provide it as a service for other people. But if I had learned it in the way that you are talking about it right now, I'd have been like I'm ready, I want to have some fun. Like this is going to be fun today, you know. Oh, my goodness.
Speaker 2:I think that's what I'm grateful for the most in my personal journey, because I started in a photo studio right in the cusp of YouTube.
Speaker 2:You know right, when it was still raw, right, so I could go on YouTube and I can find women about my skin tone, just doing makeup Right. And then, over the years, it's become a little bit more performative because it is a platform and we are trying to make money, and so the focus was more about trying to get views as well, as you know, sharing information. But the technique is very different than when I'm in the studio working with these ladies who, hey, I just want to look like my best self and I want to recognize myself in these pictures because I'm going to hand them down, I'm going to keep them and I want generations behind me to recognize me, I want them to see me and so, having that experience, really tailored my, my skills around, trying to keep it as much you as possible and in my own journey I had to go through that back and forth of I'm a makeup artist, I have to, I have to do all of this. I'm a makeup artist, I gotta show them that, and it's like the higher the pressure wasn't fun anymore not fun, or just being okay, not wearing makeup and still feeling good or being
Speaker 2:okay, just doing the little bit that I want to, not feeling like I have to wear a full glam because that's that's normal or required. So I'm like, no, let's keep this simple, let's, let's, let's make this make sense. And when I'm hearing the same stories over and over again I don't wear makeup, I don't like spend a whole lot of time putting it on. When I do put it on it, I have to worry about it, like no, I want you to put it on so you can show up and do what you came to do, but you're not supposed to be worried about your face because now you're not doing what you're supposed to do. That's right. So that's how I built, that's how I began to build my kit, my strategies, my formulation Not my formulations but I chose my product, but you chose formulation later, you know like it just came later.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's not like. I mean mean I can't mix all my stuff right. I mean I'll be customizing things to match my clients and again, that's how I got into airbrush, like I need it to be lightweight, I need to get that coverage and I don't want you to feel it, I don't want you to think about it. I don't worry about it. It's the best sign, honey, oh yeah oh my goodness, because I'm like, I want to learn. You know, we've been talking about you teaching me how to do my makeup.
Speaker 2:I'm like I don't want to learn with no brush and liquid and cream and powder. If you don't teach me, I want the airbrush. Yes, yes, I'm with it. And the thing is it's like it's different. Yeah, but I like to. I like to think of it as like learning a different language, absolutely. First of all, it feels like a different language. I know it's not the same thing. Like I can wear this all day and I don't feel like, oh, like I feel like something is creasing and I don't. It's like I'm on my face. You know, I don't feel anything on my face so yeah, I'm like airbrush.
Speaker 2:If you don't have airbrush in your life, I'm telling you, when you do get it, if you get somebody know how to do it, you'll never go back to that, that manual, because I call it manual application. Well, it would be hard to go back to that manual application. I'm just saying I like to make my girls a little bougie, yeah, a little bougie, but now that you know it's like, yeah, that's the whole thing. Only if you're not used to wearing makeup, if you know you're about to go out and then we live in texas. Oh, girls, too hot, we have to fight the heat, the sweat, the, the hormones. So you know, I, I want to be prepared for everything and I also don't want to think about it when, I don't want to worry about you right when I leave you. I want to know that you're good, yeah, and also, if you're like I'm too cute to wash my face tonight, not that I condone it, but wash that face, but you don't have to.
Speaker 2:I know we can be cute tomorrow too no it's I mean girl, would I go through to remove this Water? Ain't removing this honey.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, you better have some good makeup oil remover or something.
Speaker 2:And that's the last thing too. When I say water-resistant, waterproof. If you cry, I tell my ladies, like, if you're sweating, you're crying, you get anything wet on your face, just be cute and fan it off, it will disappear. Yeah, your face, just be cute and fan it off, it will disappear. Yeah, because we're not putting powder over top, it doesn't even require powder. You're not getting that streakiness, none of that. You just let it dry, let it be. You're water resistant girl.
Speaker 2:I'm so spoiled you are girl I am girl, why I tell you and I'll be like jessica, what you doing. My boy, you got some openings, can you please?
Speaker 1:see me. Yes, she done my makeup y'all.
Speaker 2:She does an amazing. She does my makeup. It's an amazing job. It looks great. Can you tell us about a breakthrough, mama? You experiencing your own journey of self-acceptance? Because when you were talking about um, you were talking about basically how performative everything has become and you just like I'm not doing this. Okay, let's, let's go back to that and then we'll answer this question. What made you say one day like I'm done with this. I'm gonna do what's appealing for me, what feels good for me, and I'm not following what the masses are doing out here? What made was it burnout where you was just like this ain't working, I ain't doing it, no more. It was. It was a little bit of everything. It was around covid time, okay, and I was like all right, everything is getting slow. This. I put all my eggs in this basket, and so when you get to the point, where you're like you know, I don't know what's about to.
Speaker 2:What's about to come up and trying to continue to come up with different solutions or try to reach everywhere, just like going through Pinterest what are they doing and what, what? I couldn't keep up with that. And after a while of feeling like I'm just not like her, I just can't show up like them, or why don't I get the same response, and after a while it's just like I'm tired of beating myself up. I am so over feeling this way. I am so over like, because I'm really good at going in those cycles, I'm really good at feeling, oh, those cycles, I'm really good at feeling, oh, this is good, I got this, don't nobody do nothing like this. Like I came up with this airbrush stuff just like this and nobody else. And then you post and it's like, oh, nobody cares, oh, nobody's going to see it or nobody's going to. And so after a while of going back and forth with myself's like why do I care so much about what the response is, or why do I care so much about trying to keep up with everybody else? I can't do it because that's not for me, that's not me, that's just not who I am. That's right.
Speaker 2:And that was the moment where I had to realize that I was just pushing myself outside of who I was like. I just didn't want to be me, and so it took some time to be alone and practice and really sharing my gift when it was natural. So, again, when I started teaching pole and really just having conversations like outside of makeup because makeup was now my normal, but pole was brand new it was a lot more chill. You know the the conversations were different and I started to really be able to see the true value that I can give to people. That was beyond makeup.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was putting myself in that box of I'm a makeup artist, I have to do makeup. This is all that I got. Yeah, and once I realized that, oh fuck, that I have so much more I and I had to accept it first. Right, absolutely, I had to get it first. So in that, going through and learning how to trust myself and building that strength and really being proud of myself for being consistent and for showing up for me and doing the things that I want, that started to spread out.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I can't say it was one particular moment or one particular breakthrough, because this is a choice I have to keep making it sure is I have to keep making it sure is, I have to keep making it sure is you will always keep making that choice until you finally get there, and I still believe there are going to be things that present itself to you that's going to make you keep making that choice over and over again.
Speaker 2:So, I had to accept the fact that I'm always in transition. I'm always transforming, in transition, I'm always transforming. There's always going to be a new level, a new hurdle, a new challenge for me to learn through and to grow through grow yeah, so it's not like I was looking for a place to be done.
Speaker 2:When I have this, I'm good or I'll be finished. I'll be perfect when I hit this, and that's not and that's how it is, but that's how it feels. Yes, that's how it feels. That's how it feels and I'm like I was told a lie. I don't like this life is really long. Why do I have to?
Speaker 2:keep doing this really long. I'm like, why shoot, where are the lies? What you say? Life is really long. I'm like, oh man, I just made it to 30s. There's so much more left, there's so. And there will be times when I was younger where I was like, all right, let's just phone it in, let me just get through it. But it just it keeps coming. And so I was faced with the point of okay, what are you gonna do like? Are you gonna continue acting and living this way, or are you gonna make it better for yourself because nobody else is gonna come and do it? Ain't nobody gonna come and save me?
Speaker 1:I'm not, no nobody owes me anything that's right.
Speaker 2:So I love that. I really do you want to elaborate more on? You know, the journey or that part in your life where you feel like you know this is my self-journey acceptance? You, you said you know to me, you cover that, but is it something else? You know that led you there as well? Besides, you know incorporating makeup and pole dancing like something very solo. Well, yeah, all of it was more of like a solution for me, or, yeah, I'm trying to answer all of my own problems because I felt like I'm not feminine enough. I'm none of what you know. 16 year old Jessica, or graduating Jessica, thought that I would be calm. I can look at all the things that I know, I know how to do, like the skills that I built, but look at the actual results or what I've actually done, and it's really easy to be like girl. What's wrong with?
Speaker 1:you Yep.
Speaker 2:What, why? And it wasn't until I really realized and accepted it. For me, like you're not, it's not going to get better. And if this is your habit, I made it a habit of being down on myself. I made it a habit of judging myself. I made it a habit of doing this and, at the same time, being a makeup artist and having all these shoots and still having these conversations with women and hearing the same things over and over and over again, especially with women 40 and up or 60 and up, and they're they're telling me stories of.
Speaker 2:I'm just now learning how to love myself. I'm just now figuring out I've dedicated my life to my kids and now they're grown and they're gone and I don't know what to do and I'm like, ok, I want to love all y'. They're gone and I don't know what to do and I'm like, okay, I want to love on y'all. I want, I want to help you to feel good in this way, but also I want to take this lesson from you and learn how can I avoid that good for you, how can I do it for me? But what I'm still learning and still accepting is that, again, it's not a sprint. It's not a sprint. It's not like a magic spell.
Speaker 2:So I wish I could bippity, boppity, boop and be like I don't really do and just let it be done. But it's, that's not how it works. I know and so and you're learning. So, young girl, you're learning at least a decade. You know ahead of everyone that you're speaking to, so you're gonna be a decade ahead. But that's the thing. I always felt behind. I always felt like I'm catching up, I'm not where I should be, because maybe the people you were following.
Speaker 2:Maybe they were where you at that time, you know, just wanted to be. I really want to blame it all on that, but I know it was me, it was you. Yeah, sometimes we just compare ourselves to like where someone is in their journey and it's where your goal is, but in your own different, unique way. And so then you kind of feel like, oh my gosh, like they are so far ahead, I'm so far behind, like I gotta do this, I gotta do that and that's when you really start losing touch of yourself.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, yeah, that's exactly what happened, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so growing up I was one of those kids that would watch like Star Search or Disney Channel. I was like oh, I'm like y'all cute, but I can do that. Oh, I would really hope to be noticed. That's what I really, what I realized, Like I wouldn't put myself out there, I wouldn't allow myself or open myself up. I was wanting or needing to be discovered. I was needing for somebody to come and tell me oh, I see the value in you.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh, you're so valuable.
Speaker 2:And that never happened. And then when it did start happening in my artist community or as I was becoming an artist, I couldn't receive it. Why I couldn't receive it? I didn't believe it. I did not believe it. Do you feel like it took too long for you know that recognition to happen and that's why you couldn't receive it? It was more like what you know about me, what you know, what do you know, you don't know me. I love that I can be of service, but also this is customer service. Or when I got it back, people oh, you look so pretty, oh your makeup is so pretty, oh, this is that. And I couldn't take it because, again, that is so outer layer. It is that I really felt like you don't know me.
Speaker 2:Yeah you want them to see the value from within, exactly so, or after a while, I'm like I need to. I need to love that part of me so that I can even let it show.
Speaker 2:So you're rejecting that part of you, yeah, you know, and then expecting people to accept it Exactly, but then you're rejecting it. So why would they accept the rejection of what you also rejecting yourself Exactly? It don't make no sense. That's right. Yeah, that's true, it happens, though it does, you know, we aren't like.
Speaker 2:So I love listening to him when I'm working out, and that's something he brought up, so I'm. When you mentioned that, that's what came to my mind, because he was said he, the podcast is called, you can't sit with us. And he said are you inviting all of you to the table, not the parts that you reject, but the parts that you accept? And then you're sitting around a group of people that's gonna only accept those parts. So then when you want to bring the rejection to the table, it's like, oh, but you, you expecting them to accept that and you don't. That makes no sense. It does not make no sense. And I think that's another part that really drew me into pole, because in pole I could just open up and be silly and be weird, and and you are open you know you are fun, like uh-huh, like you are not like a person that's stiff and like um, like I don't know the word maybe like conservative.
Speaker 2:You know you are bubbly, always happy. You know just a good aura to be like, a good, positive aura to be around. So sometimes in the beauty industry it's very vain, yeah, you know, and it's hard to kind of be yourself. Sometimes people think the energy you know should be vain and just closed off. You know. You know I can be, I could be very grateful and say I have never really been around those people, I've never really been in that situation, I've always either. I'm just so grateful observing you know from different platforms.
Speaker 2:You know, I'm like that's, it's pretty vain. You know, in some uh atmospheres, yes, yeah, or especially when it's competitive when it's competitive. When it's competitive, not collaborative yeah, everybody wants to have like this celebrity style look, but I'm like, no, yeah, my, I have been blessed to attract with the personality that I have let through they usually say that, though, yeah they say that you normally book people who are very similar to you. Yeah, so when it comes to like bridezillas, never.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I've had the best time with my brides and and I let them know like I'm going to be in your personal space during your day.
Speaker 1:It has to be.
Speaker 2:The least I can do is make sure that you feel comfortable. And I'm the last step before you go out on your wedding day. This is like the biggest day for you to have your makeup done, because you really are stepping into a brand new identity. That's right. So I want to make sure that we're doing this right. So, girl, if somebody is here they ain't supposed to be here, yeah. If there's somebody that you don't want them out, yeah. But like, I'm here for you, yeah.
Speaker 2:And that's why you don't run into bride zealots, because you do have an opportunity to build a rapport, whether that's through consulting or the makeup trial, and that's why I feel like I can run into some bridesmaid zealots, because we just don't know each other. You know, we haven't had an opportunity to have, you know, reoccurring conversations, to even understand each other, because this term brazil, I'm like where? Who created it? We said not me, because I'm like I don't have brazil is. My brides have been amazing. Yeah, it's usually the counterparts, yeah, and I just feel like it's not their personality. It's just that we haven't had an opportunity to build that rapport. I don't know you like that and you don't know me. We haven't built the trust. Unlike me and the bride, you know there'd be a lot of stuff that go into it. Yeah.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:I'm learning that. You know, okay, what you have done has worked. It's working. Yeah, what is blocking you from letting everything out, thing out like, so building that, that practice and that confidence in in my safe space, yes, is allowing me or helping me to really open up and just give a hundred percent and then let y'all deal with it afterwards because I got, I've been holding too much back and it's like I don't know how to get it out, so we just going to word vomit and then we can figure it out. That's right. No, seriously, okay, how do you integrate the lessons you've learned from pole dancing into your life as a makeup artist? Oh well, I think it's a little bit backwards. I think makeup oh okay, makeup inspires more how I move and pull, maybe not just makeup, but makeup and photography.
Speaker 2:My experience being in the studio of okay, I know what you're going for. I already know how you feel. I've heard these stories over and over again. It has really taught me how to speak and how to kind of just girl, like, get out of your own head, big sister, you right, like, okay, you tripping absolutely and you need somebody that'll be. Like, all right, you tripping, you can do this. Just get over yourself and keep it doing so. My knowledge of posing and just helping women through those awkward situations has really helped me to give better direction while I'm in pole. I love that and, yeah, it also taught me to let them or have a moment or a few classes of getting to know each other. I can't go in with a hard and fast plan like you got to know this, this and that, like I have to get to know you that's too much pressure it is.
Speaker 2:I mean, we talking about poe. Yeah, that's a lot of pressure, yeah, it's a whole lot of pressure. You're you coming in with these, these conceptions and these ideas, and so it's like and you like attacking them, girl and they're coming in like break it down, let it go, let it go.
Speaker 2:Let it go, let it go like there's no perfection, there's no, you just just be yourself. Yeah, so the makeup has really helped me figure out how to, how do I teach really, or just how to get the message across a little bit better. But you feel like the makeup is first because you've been in makeup, you know before pole dancing yeah, because I can see it going either way, depending on what you were doing first.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it really inspired me to well, it gave me a more confidence. Yes, for because I'm like okay, I know, I know posing, I know what looks good, I know how to make people look good, I get the idea and I guess, metaphorically, I like the idea of the pole being. You know, a straight is representing of the masculine.
Speaker 1:And me.
Speaker 2:I heighten my feminine and trying to be fluid and curvy and flowy and just free. And just free, because when you're masculine or when you have a strong core, when you have a rock that you're solid you know it's going to hold me you can let go and flow. So I built that little metaphor in my head and it just worked for me. Yeah, I love that Absolutely. So what role does community play in both makeup and pole dancing? Oh, it's everything. It's everything, because doing, doing things by yourself, I mean we have to do everything by ourselves. Yeah, I mean, at the end of the day, any self-love work it I. You can go to all the talks, you can listen to all the podcasts, read all the books, but until you decide that you want to do something for you, nothing is going to happen so I can't.
Speaker 2:It's an action, exactly. It's not. It's not abstract that I was very concrete I can't make you do it and I can't help you if you don't want to. So with that, like I can just only create an opportunity and pull was what I want. I was tired of being in the house. I I'm like I am bored.
Speaker 1:You need to get out. Yeah, I need to get out.
Speaker 2:I don't really want a club, but I want to dance. I don't really want to be around a whole lot of people.
Speaker 1:Where's that happy medium? Exactly, where's that happy medium? And I?
Speaker 2:found it at pole. And so now I'm like, okay, because I feel safe, because I enjoy it here, let me go ahead and expand. And I can set the tone of being okay, this is the community, we are all besties here. Because I mean we're going to get comfortable, we all half naked anyway, yep, yep. So I can set the tone of be silly, say the thing Let loose, like, move around, like this is safe, nobody's going to leave and talk about you later.
Speaker 2:That's right, you know you don't have to worry about. Oh, she did. There's none of that. And, like I found in my pole partner, you may be with somebody, or experience somebody. That is strengths that are opposite of yours, that you can go in and so you can learn from them. You can pull from other people. And now, instead of scrolling and looking for inspiration, our inspiration is right in front of us. Yeah, we have accountability partners and it's not just, oh, I'm here with my one best friend, like I'm trying to make everybody mix and mingle and get to know everybody. Again, there's it's a very small space, so let's all be cool, let's all be comfortable, and now you can, you can feed off of each other a little bit better, but it being in real life versus being online or manufactured yeah, it's.
Speaker 1:I've heard about the pole dancing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh, manufactured pole dancing. Yes, well, I was. I'll call it manufactured because it's virtual to me that's like a manufactured pole dancing.
Speaker 2:I mean, yeah, you know but yeah, having having a community to do it with you, to cheer you on, I mean I can do all things. And through the power of a bunch of women clapping their hands and saying, hey, yeah, good job, like we're cheering each other on, because sometimes that's what you need. You just need, you just need somebody to hype you up, because I feel like the virtual pole dancing there is absolutely no, I mean, they have online community.
Speaker 1:They do.
Speaker 2:But I do wonder what? How does it feel different from the online, opposed to, you know, like being in person and actually really connecting with people? I did online classes and I was not ready.
Speaker 2:You have to be a little bit more experienced. Unless it's like a straight up beginner's class, it does require that stamina and that experience. But when you come in in person, you have that opportunity to get your classroom movements tailored towards you and correct it and correct it Like on the spot. Absolutely, because your form is so important. But it's really important to me to build that relationship so that you can really get what you want out of it. Yeah, and then after you learn the basics and you're more comfortable, then you can move on to the online classes. Yeah, with you know, with your knowledge base. But when you're just getting started again, you need to work on, like, how you feel about yourself and how, because we've all brought gym equipment that we don't use. We all have a lot of stuff that just started in the inspiration, yeah, and then just died off, yeah. But when you have your people, you have that confidence in your foundation, then it's a little bit easier. It's a lot more fun to actually continue and keep going. I agree.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's levels to this, absolutely.
Speaker 2:So what are your goals for the future, in both makeup artistry and pole dance coaching? So, as I grow, I really just it's weird to say, but I feel like it's gonna come to me. I feel like that this is the year that I have to really move with intuition and trust myself. So, at the core of it, it's sharing what my solution is for me and learning how to really open up and shine at 100. Let your brightness out, let it do the things, yes, and then what's supposed to happen? What's coming to?
Speaker 2:you will be attracted in, especially with pole dancing being so new yes, you know, absolutely, I can see that, and you, you're like a veteran in makeup, you know, and so, with makeup, I want to. I want a community where we could subscribe and practice the, the mental part, the, the slow. I'm taking my time, I'm loving me during the application and I would love to geek out with some other makeup artists and really just spill all the beans on how to airbrush and what you need and all of that. And that's again because I'm a makeup geek, absolutely. But, um, I really want mostly freedom. I want my time, I want to have a great time and I want to be around people who are learning and growing and expanding and are going off and doing amazing things for whatever that is or whatever that means for them. So, instead of being the one to go out and do all the makeovers myself, I just want to share everything that I know and try to spread it around and use my, my best skills of strategizing and coming up with these formulations.
Speaker 2:Well, formulations, coming up with these techniques, but they are, though it is a formulation, it's a formulation. I just like the way how you your foundation to get to the formulation. Yeah, you know, because formulations wouldn't feel so negative or just discouraging, that's the word. Yeah, discouraging if you get the foundation of let, or just discouraging, that's the word. Discouraging If you get the foundation of let's just have fun, see what we come up with, exactly, you know, and just go from there Exactly, going through the flow. So with other artists teaching them how to look at their clients and really honor their beauty in a way that's natural to them and how to apply it with the airbrush, and just the quick things that I do, maybe not on the forefront like I'm thinking of, but the quick things that will make the actual process easier and the final results a lot better. But also being able to give that feedback like, hey, jessica, how can I make this?
Speaker 2:better hey, how can I fix this or how do I put this together? Oh, girl, I got you because I said I spent the last 10 years yeah, oh my gosh, the last decade really perfecting, um, this makeup process, just because I love it so much, and so I love sharing it with my clients, but I also want to share it with other artists who can pick it up and run with it Absolutely. So what is one key takeaway you want listeners to remember about self-confidence and beauty? When it comes to makeup and pole dancing, the main thing is, again, it's between you and you.
Speaker 1:You versus you.
Speaker 2:It's always you versus you yeah, like I can tell you all the things, I can point you to the podcast. I can write blogs, we can. We can do all the do because I done, did it. Yeah, I did it. I read it all and nothing changed, nothing mattered, nothing adjusted until I really decided and committed to allowing myself to open up yes and being okay with doing my best.
Speaker 2:Yes, and so if even every day I can't show up fully 100, I'm showing up and I'm giving it everything and learning how to forgive myself, learning how to come back around that's a hard one and and to continue so it was. That is. It was not until I accepted. It was not until I, I was okay with just being me. Yes, that anything could happen or I can even allow anything in. So, yeah, I can tell you all the stuff and whatnot, but it will not matter until you decide it for you, just like I couldn't accept anything from anybody until I accepted it for myself. So I'm just gonna throw out there what works for me. I'm gonna, I'm gonna share what I enjoy and what I love, and then, when you're ready, then I'm here. Absolutely. But you can't make nobody do nothing. No, and what they say.
Speaker 2:You can bring the horse to the water, but you can't make a drink and you don't need just one sip girl, what so the night drink the whole pun you need the whole thing, because it's not just one decision, it's making the same choice over and over again, maybe every day Choosing you, maybe every hour. Over and, over and over again. Just coming back to it and it's like, okay, I am committed to opening it up, and then it gets easier.
Speaker 1:Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2:Okay. So how can listeners get involved in pole dancing or book makeup appointments with you? Oh lord, oh no, they come on down um, and I will share all of these links in the description, you know, of the video on youtube and also on buzzsprout, so that you know whenever she do say this information, y'all can actually have the information, so it don't be so hard, you don't be so overwhelmed like, let me get it right. Let me get it right. Yeah, where's everything? But everything's in my name, jessicablinscom. You can go there and you can join my email list and you can find some of my makeup, um tutorials or classes. And then for pole dancing I'm again. I'm still rather small, so you can reach out to me on instagram, jessica blends, and our pole studio is in carpus cove, so I have small classes there in person. But if people are like, listen, I can't come out, I want to do something at home, well then, we can definitely expand and start doing things online.
Speaker 2:So if you're interested, just reach out and let me know and then we'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. But when it comes to makeup again, yeah, I'm in Killeen, the classes are online and if you want to feel and experience the airbrush for yourself, definitely reach out to me and we can break it down for you. Like, it's something you have to experience at least once. But I'm telling you, after the first experience, it will be very hard to go back. It's going to be very hard to go back. I'm telling you, the first time you airbrushed me, I was like, oh my gosh, I could wear this all day. I don't feel like ugh, I hate feeling the makeup.
Speaker 1:That's the main thing, especially if I don't feel like, uh, you know I hate feeling the makeup, yeah, you know so.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's the main thing, especially if you don't wear it a lot. You know so, man, you hate feeling anything on your face. Exactly, it's uncomfortable and, again, if you're not comfortable, then you're not really showing up, as you're foolish, you can't. You're thinking about your face or what you look like. You're not focused on what you're supposed to be doing. Very, very true, that's what I want All right girl I love it.
Speaker 2:Well, thank you so much for carving time out of your busy schedule to share with us today. I really appreciate you. I love how you articulate and express yourself, so I had to invite you on as a guest, because when you are doing my makeup and we are just having our conversations, I'm like people need to hear her Girl. I'm like people need to hear her. I need to know this hidden gem, honey, because I feel like it's so many people out here on these platforms and there are so many hidden gems that are not getting pushed and noticed and, for whatever reason, I'm like let's start exposing these hidden gems so people can know who these people are. And I appreciate you. When I met you, you I was in a place of really starting to expand or really trying to figure myself out, and we really just clicked.
Speaker 1:We did and when I tell you, I don't click, I'm not.
Speaker 2:I mean, I'm a friendly person, but I don't but there's a difference between friendly and clicking, yeah, it's different. And so throughout our relationship, just watching you grow and all of the things that you're doing for your family and to expand, just after moving here brand new and picking up it was, it was really like inspiring and even with you and our relationship, I'll be honest, like I had a moment where I'm like, damn, I need to be like Kenetra, I can't hang out with her because I don't have my shit together.
Speaker 2:She don't look at me like. I'm like and I know that's not how you felt, but that's how I felt and that's just kind of like from the outside looking in, because it's like you only see the exterior but not knowing what the interior is you know, it's just like yeah, I'm still working on it, I'm still figuring it today, still trying to figure it out.
Speaker 2:I don't care what's being posted. You know, one day I'll get to the place where I can share the struggle. Yeah, you know, but right now, it's not that I don't want to share. I do want to share. But the way how everything like I have to get where you are, honestly, where it's like honey, this is what's working for me. I'm not working with how people and social media want us to work. In order to show up, I have to get where you are. So, girl, what are you talking about? Well, I'm glad we're here. Because we were. I felt like we come back.
Speaker 2:We came back at the perfect time because you know, we will meet up taco tuesday every tuesday the taco place ain't even there, no more. It ain't even there, no more and that was our spot every single tuesday and kobe hit and then it just went kind of like we lost it so I'm like okay we just gotta get back there, you know, and we will, but I'm so grateful for you girl, thank you because I would not have done this if you had not asked me.
Speaker 2:I going onto a podcast would have been so much more scary and intimidating, like if it had been with anybody else. I don't, I don't feel like it could this podcast.
Speaker 2:We had to fight for it too, I don't know, but yeah, just really allowing yourself to open up, and again, it's something that I'm encouraging other people to do, while I'm still learning how to do it myself. Like you said, it's going to be a transitioning journey. It's going to always be happening in some kind of way, like the podcast is a new one for you. You know, that's why I was like it's gonna be always things like opportunities thrown out there for you to be like okay, am I gonna step back or am I gonna transition and move forward with this too. You know that's what's like. It's always gonna be something to make you keep pushing and transitioning more and more and more. Yeah, I like this, I like it here. You might not get rid of me, girl.
Speaker 2:I'm not trying to let's pull up another chair. Who want to come in? This is a duo now girl, we'll figure that out too this is it this feels good and been searching for more things. That really lights me up, and when you feel it, you gotta stick to it. So I'm really proud of you.
Speaker 1:I'm really excited with all the things that you've gotten going on, thank you.
Speaker 2:On top of all the stuff that you're doing at home. Girl, I know you work hard. I know you work hard.
Speaker 1:That's a wrap for today's episode of Hair. What I'm Saying? A huge thank you to Jessica Washington for sharing her inspiring journey in both the makeup and pole dancing world, reminding us all that beauty comes from confidence within. If you're looking to elevate your beauty routine or break through self-doubt with movement, jessica's got you covered. Be sure to check out her work and follow her for more and, as always, thank you for tuning in. If you enjoyed this episode, don't forget to subscribe, share and leave a review. Until next time, remember, beauty starts from the inside, but we can always have fun enhancing it. You, you, you, you, you.